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"The Young Fella"
By Don Cassidy |
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My
father's grandfather's name was Frank. He had several sons, and by
tradition, they all named one of their sons Frank after their
grandfather. Because there were so many Frank Cassidys around Donegal,
they all had nicknames like Big Frank and Little Frank. One of them was
known as Young Frank and the Young Fella. He was about ten or fifteen
years younger than my father.
In 1965, when I was a freshman in college, where my favorite course was
Sociology, I came home a day early for Thanksgiving. This was a
fortunate surprise for my father and Uncle Michael because they needed a
ride to New York to attend the Young Fella's funeral. I was happy to
drive them. And, after studying the rituals of the Greeks, the Puerto
Ricans, and the Hopi Indians in my Sociology course, I welcomed the
chance to participate in the most Irish of rituals--the wake and
funeral.
The funeral home was on Morningside Drive in Manhattan somewhere near
Columbia University, where what was still left of Irish New York
overlooked Harlem. This was sort of a New York version of a scene from
The Last Hurrah. The Young Fella had not done well in America. He
never had a good job. He never got married or had kids. His close
relatives seemed to have tolerated him but not exactly cherished him. He
had no burial insurance. My father and Uncle Michael were aware of this
on the way to New York. They quietly agreed that they would offer to
help to pay for the funeral so the burden would not be all on the Gorman
girls. The Gormans were apparently the relatives that tolerated the
Young Fella the most, and they had arranged the funeral.
After I had dropped my father and Uncle Michael off at the funeral home,
I drove off for a parking place and then walked back. When I ran into
Big Frank, I said hello but he hadn't seen me since I was about eight
years old, and he didn't recognize me even when I told him my first
name. So I had to explain who I was. This was awkward because I couldn't
just say I'm Frank's son or Frank Cassidy's son. I had to name just
about all of my close relatives and give him our old Bronx address
before he placed me. And then he was delighted to see me.
When I went into the funeral parlor I saw the Young Fella, who at 63,
didn't look very young. My father introduced me to some of my cousins
that I didn't know and they were very friendly. I met the Young Fella's
brother and his daughter (my cousin- Mary Margaret) who had come down
from Boston by bus. I think his name was Tommy. My father told Michael
that Tommy looked good. He said this in a sort of surprised way.
I don't remember the name of the church but when the funeral Mass was
over, my father and Uncle Michael and Big Frank and Willy Bradley sort
of huddled around, and my father said something about not putting the
entire burden on the Gorman girls and then they all ponied up some money
and went over to one of the Gorman girls and gave her the money. I think
she seemed a little surprised by this since all of them were basically
living on Social Security and pensions.
I was taking this all in with great pride in being Irish. I was thinking
"We're good people- we take care of our own." Even the ones we don't
like that much and who die without insurance. And we don't put the
entire burden on some single women who happen to have gotten stuck with
the arrangements just because they lived near him. I was also impressed
that this seemed like very respectable funeral, with several pall
bearers, a nice funeral home, a beautiful church. And the mourners,
although small in number, were all dressed pretty respectably in suits
and ties or nice coats and dresses.
After church we headed for Gate of Heaven Cemetery which was way up past
the Bronx in some small New York town. I had a hard time keeping up with
the funeral car on the West Side Drive because it zipped across all the
traffic and into the high speed lane.
After the prayers at the cemetery, Willie Bradley cornered the priest to
make sure he was aware that his son was Father Bill Bradley of such and
such a parish in New York and the priest then made some remark about how
he was so glad that he had told him that.
When we got back into the car my father said to Uncle Michael, "Well,
that's the last of the Young Fella."
We were invited to Bradley's house in Riverdale. Before he retired,
Bradley had been a successful business man--he ran his own store
(saloon) on Amsterdam Ave. Bradley was a tea totaler but he served my
father and Uncle Michael whiskey, which they drank straight with no ice.
Since I wasn't used to seeing them drink whiskey this way I assumed that
this was a ritual reserved for special occasions like funerals. Then
Mary Bradley called us into the kitchen for a wee bite--stew and Irish
bread.
My father and Uncle Michael said we should visit their cousin Aggie
Furey who lived near Dykeman Street in Manhattan because her husband Dan
had died suddenly fairly recently. You could tell Aggie was having a
hard time; she said that she didn't care any more. She hadn't gone to
the Young Fella's funeral and she said that the beer gardens got all his
money. Her daughter Ann, who was very pretty and was about twenty-two,
came home and served my father and Uncle Michael some more whiskey which
they again took straight and without ice.
By now it was pretty late in the day and we headed back to Freewood
Acres and got home around supper time. Uncle Michael was extremely
grateful and complimentary about my driving them all over New York.
I was proud of my father and Uncle Michael and the Irish people in
general for our great culture where cousins take care of each other and
chip in for decent funerals for relatives who don't do so well in
America and die without life insurance. And I was happy that we Irish
have cool customs and rituals like the Greeks and the Puerto Ricans and
the Hopi Indians.
Post
Script 1-
This event took place in
November 1965. About thirty-five years later we put the story on the web
site. Within a few years we received an-email from the Young Fella's
niece, Mary Margaret, who joined us for a St. Patrick's Day Cassidy
gathering in 2006- just 40 years after our first meeting.
Post Script 2- In 2005 we received an e-mail from
Sally Gallagher Campbell, who told us that Young Fella lived with her
father just before he died and is buried next to her parents, Frank and
Margaret Bradley Gallagher. --In another example of generosity, Frank
Gallagher had provided the gravesite for his needy cousin.